Meetings can be very useful when a family is faced with a tough decision, like whether to move a parent to assisted living. They provide a chance for relatives to come together, pool their knowledge, and discuss various options and strategies.
It can be tough even to make the decision to hold such a meeting. The most important family members may not all live close together, so location is a challenge. People’s schedules are packed and some may be reluctant to add one more thing to the calendar. Sometimes it’s assumed that other relatives don’t want to get together. However, it never hurts to ask. Due to the serious nature of the decision, people may be more inclined to be cooperative. And if their lives are heavily affected by caring for mom or dad, they will be interested in solutions that will improve the situation.
It is important to include the affected senior, even if it means overcoming challenges presented by physical or mental disability or resistance to facing the need for care. There are several reasons why you may feel this is inappropriate, but making sure your loved one is included in the process is vital to making any solution work. They deserve the respect of knowing that they have say in decisions affecting their life, and you can’t find a solution for them unless you have their own opinion on what their needs are. You may be surprised to learn how they see the issue. This does not mean that the solution mom or dad would choose on their own is necessarily the best one and that they have final say, but you do need to take into account their concerns.
Consider including any paid caregivers or others who provide household services. The cleaning lady who comes in on Fridays may have noticed something you haven’t. Also consider bringing in the senior’s friends and neighbors. A social worker or for families where religion is important, a spiritual advisor, may also be helpful.
Try to plan the meeting at a time when it’s easier for far-flung family to travel, perhaps during the holidays. When planning the agenda, make sure everyone will get a chance to speak so that they can make their case for what is important to them, and be sure to devote significant time to what the senior has to say themselves. Have everyone in the group review the agenda in advance. Also choose people to take on different tasks: someone who can be a neutral facilitator, someone to take notes, someone to keep time. Plan to hold the meeting in a place that will comfortable and have food and beverages available. Try to choose somewhere that allows a layout where everyone can make eye contact with one another.
Tension exists in any family, even those where the members are close and get along well. It’s a normal part of life. Bringing everyone together at once will cause these problems to rise to the surface. Keep conflict to a minimum by focusing everyone on finding solutions for the future, not on rehashing past grief. Remind everyone that there will be no perfect solution and there will have to be compromise in some form. You won’t be able to fix everything then and there. The point is to gather perspectives and come up with practical answers.
When you’ve finished the meeting, send the notes to people who were interested but unable to attend, and follow up on whatever course of action was agreed upon. Even if you decide that assisted living is not the right choice now, in time your parent is very likely to need help. Make plans to have them visit facilities you are considering and prepare for an eventual move. It never hurts to have alternate solutions available for when they might be needed. The one thing you can always count on is change.
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One of the hardest things for seniors living on their own is having meals that are both nutritious and enjoyable. Cooking for one person is tough enough when you’re young and energetic, but when everyday tasks are more difficult and you move more slowly, it’s that much more difficult. Some seniors can’t get out to the grocery store to even get food to begin with. Especially when it comes to men and others who may not have done much cooking earlier in their lives, making your own meals can seem like an impossible task. In these situations, seniors tend to go for what’s quick and easy, not what would be the most ideal choice from a health standpoint.
In addition, seniors living by themselves eat alone much of the time. Having dinner with only the TV for company can be pretty lonely. Even if the senior lives with family, how often in busy homes with kids does everyone come together to share a meal? Despite the living situation the end result may be the same: a microwave dinner in front of the evening news while children stay late to deal with work responsibilities and grandchildren attend basketball practice or reherse for the school play. This scenario may make the senior feel even more cast aside.
To be fair, some seniors are still excellent cooks and can fend for themselves. But the chances are good that sooner or later, food will become an issue. When it does, it can contribute to making a senior’s delicate health even worse. Poor nuturition makes people more likely to get sick, can exacerbate conditions like Alzheimer’s and dementia, and can lead to depression.
Those who are concerned about their older loved ones should not wait for the senior to ask for help, as sometimes they will fear the loss of their independence and hide problems. Watch for clues like excessive weight loss or a refrigerator with barren shelves or expired food. Consider whether getting to the grocery store is a challenge: does the senior have trouble getting outside his or her home? You also may want to ask if he or she is having problems with swallowing or chewing or if they’re experiencing a loss of appetite.
This is one area in which assisted living can make a big difference in a senior’s life. Assisted living residents do not have to worry about cooking for themselves. They get to have regular mealtimes within a community and experience the comfort of gathering together with people they know. A good assisted living facility will make sure the senior gets the proper diet for his or her specific health issues.
We all feel happier when eating well and enjoying good company. Attention to this area can be a huge boost in a senior’s quality of life.
/by Raya's ParadiseYour selection of an assisted living facility should involve both tours of the places you are considering and extensive conversations with those running the facility. Comparing different facilities to one another can seem overwhelming. Use the checklist of questions below to help you notice important details that can reveal the true quality of a facility and aid you in the selection process.
Note that if you are evaluating assisted living facilities on behalf of a loved one, you should try to involve them in the process and get as much of a sense of their desires as possible. He or she is the one who will actually be living in the facility, and his or her comfort, happiness, and satisfaction is the most important outcome.
In General
/by Raya's Paradise- What is your gut feeling about the assisted living facility both at the beginning and end of your visit?
- Do the current residents seem happy and satisfied?
- If you are able to talk with residents or their families about their experience, what do they say?
- What do you learn when you research reviews and other information about the facility online?
- Is the facility clean and free of odors?
- Is the temperature appropriate?
- Does the environment feel attractive and comfortable?
- How many units are in the facility?
- Does the assisted living facility offer private or shared rooms, or a mix?
- What common areas are available?
- Will any features of the community pose a problem for your condition?
- Are the rooms large enough to meet your needs comfortably?
- What are residents allowed to bring with them when they move in?
- What are residents allowed or not allowed to do within their own rooms?
- Does each resident have a written care plan? How often is it reviewed and revised?
- Who is involved when assessing the resident’s needs? How much say does the resident have?
- How does the assisted living facility adapt as the resident’s needs change?
- What services does the facility offer and how often are they provided?
- Is staff available to assist the residents 24 hour per day?
- Are special care units available, for example for dementia patients?
- How often are meals served, what times, and where?
- How much variety is there in the menu?
- Does the kitchen accommodate special needs and requests?
- Is the facility well lit and does it have clear signage?
- Are there call buttons in the rooms?
- Are there safety locks on the windows and doors?
- Are there handrails in the bathrooms and elsewhere in the facility?
- Is the carpet firm to assist with walking, and are there non-slip materials on the floor?
- Is there an emergency generator or another plan in place for power outages?
- What do the assisted living facility’s fire safety and security systems consist of?
- What is the plan if a resident wanders off?
- What is the plan for a resident’s medical emergency?
- What is the hiring process for new employees? Is there a background check?
- What are the policies about elder abuse and neglect?
- Would you or your loved one get along with the assisted living facility’s current residents?
- How does the staff treat you?
- How does the staff interact with the current residents? Do they seem to have a good relationship with them and know their names?
- How do staff members treat each other?
- Are residents chatting with one another during meals?
- What organized activities are on the schedule? What activities do you notice taking place? Are they well-attended?
- Are residents encouraged to attend activities?
- How much interaction do residents have with the outside community?
- Are you allowed to examine a contract? Does it clearly lay out all services, fees, and policies?
- How much is the entrance fee and security deposit? Is the deposit refundable?
- What is the monthly fee?
- Is long-term care insurance accepted?
- How does the assisted living facility bill for services?
- What is the policy on late payments?
- How are rate increases handled?
- What if the resident runs out of money?
- What are the rules for when residents must leave the facility? What are the most common reasons why residents leave?
- How are refunds and transfers handled?
Story by John North, KABC
WEST HOLLYWOOD, Calif. (KABC) — They are fathers, mothers, grandparents and even great-grandparents, and they need 24-hour care. But people living in a Hollywood neighborhood just off trendy Melrose Avenue say they already have too many elderly-care facilities. And now they’re fighting back.
Rose Katz turned 92 years old Monday. The kitchen table is filled with the desserts she will share with the other residents and staff. She lives in a home for people with Alzheimer’s disease and dementia in West Hollywood.
It is a care home run by the same people who were turned down by the city of Los Angeles. They were denied a permit to build on Sierra Bonita Avenue. The builders, Raya’s Paradise, are appealing the denial.
“They need special care that they can’t get on their own and that’s what’s being provided here,” said Robert Cherno, a land-use consultant. “It’s a homelike setting rather than an institution, and it’s the ideal setting according to several studies that have been done.”
The West Hollywood home has been there 20 years and houses 30 elderly people.
Sarah Rinde would be a neighbor of the proposed new home in Los Angeles. Her concern is a new facility would alter the character of the neighborhood. The builder, Raya’s Paradise, would construct a new facility. But they say it would maintain the local architecture.
“I know that they need help too, it’s just, I love architecture. I see both sides,” said Rinde.
It is not easy finding affordable residential care for Alzheimer’s and dementia patients. The city of Los Angeles has never before had an appeal such as the one filed because of the denial.
Attempts to reach L.A. City Councilman Ed Reyes for comment on the denial have been unsuccessful.
The appeal goes before the city council in two weeks. As the population grows older the question of where they are going to live becomes more critical.
See the story on KABC’s website HERE.
(Copyright ©2012 KABC-TV/DT. All Rights Reserved.)
/by Raya's ParadiseFrom CBN TV: Researchers say the ketones found in coconut oil have slowed the progression of Alzheimer’s disease in some people and may actually prevent it.
Click here to read the article and download information.
Transcript:
/by Raya's Paradise
Can Coconut Oil Be the Answer?Lori Johnson: Steve Newports Alzheimer’s disease has slowed considerably. Some of his symptoms even reversed thanks to an unlikely treatment prescribed by his wife, Doctor Mary Newport a physician who runs a neonatology ward at a Tampa, Florida hospital. She became determined to help her husband after he failed the so called Alzheimer’s clock test.Doctor Mary Newport: He drew a few little circles and several numbers just in a very random pattern, didn’t really look anything like a clock and the Doctor pulled me aside and she said, “You know he’s actually on the verge of severe Alzheimer’s at this point, he’s beyond moderate”. So that was very, very devastating news.
Lori Johnson: Doctor Newport began learning everything she could about her husbands disease.
Doctor Mary Newport: It appears to be a type of diabetes of the brain. It’s a process that starts to happen at least 10 or 20 years before you start having symptoms and it’s very similar to type 1 or type 2 diabetes in that you develop a problem with insulin.
Lori Johnson: In this case, insulin problems prevent brains cells from excepting glucose, their primary fuel. Without it the cells eventually die, but there is an alternative fuel, key tones which the cells easily except. Key tones are metabolized in the liver after you eat medium chain triglycerides, which are found in coconut oil. So Doctor Newport added coconut oil to Steve’s diet. Just two weeks later he took the clock test again and as you can see demonstrated stunning improvement.
Doctor Mary Newport: I thought at the time was it just good luck? Was it a lot of prayer? Was it the coconut oil? And I thought well, we’re going to keep the coconut oil going.
Lori Johnson: Then, 3 weeks later he took the clock test for a third time, and continued to get better and it wasn’t just intellectually, he also improved emotionally and physically.
Doctor Mary Newport: He was not able to run, he was able to run again or he couldn’t read for about a year and a half but after somewhere around 2 or 3 months he was able to read. Instead of being very sluggish, not talking very much in the morning, he would come out with energy and talkative and joking and he could find his water and utensils.
Lori Johnson: Doctor Newport documented Steve’s success in a book called, Alzheimer’s Disease: What if there was a Cure? She received this stake of thank you letters from other people who’s loved ones Alzheimer’s was helped after they followed Steve’s diet. While coconut oil is encouraging, there’s actually something much more powerful. A team of biochemists lead by Professor Kieran Clarke at England’s Oxford University have developed a key tone, Ester, that packs a punch ten times great than coconut oil.
Kieran Clarke: It reaches quite considerably higher levels and you can get whatever levels you want depending on how much you drink.
Lori Johnson: The problem is, they need millions of dollars to mass produce it.
Kieran Clarke: Very expensive and so we can’t make very much of it ourselves and what we would like is funding so that we can actually scale up and make it but of course there is no real profit in manufacturing stuff like that.
Lori Johnson: So until a high potency key tone, Ester, is available to the general public coconut oil is still a good key tone source. Just make sure it’s pure, non hydrogenated. Avoid any hydrogenated oil, which is the same thing as dangerous trans fat. Many people avoid coconut oil because they think it’s bad for them, but it’s actually very healthy. Dr. Beverly Teter is a researcher at the University of Maryland who specializes in dietary fats. She says years ago coconut oil was criticized for raising cholesterol, but scientists have since learned there are two kinds of cholesterol. Low density lipoprotein, the bad kind and High density lipoprotein which is very good for you and is the kind that coconut oil raises.
Doctor Beverly Teter: So they put out the message that it increases the serum cholesterol but the truth of the matter was helping to profile of the serum cholesterol. That never has been corrected in the public press and I think that’s the reason people have the misconceptions about it.
Lori Johnson: So, not only does coconut oil improve your cholesterol levels, Doctor Teter says the way it helps the brains of some Alzheimer’s patients can be extended to people with Parkinson’s disease, Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, Epilepsy, Dementia, even Schizophrenia and Autism and one more thing, coconut oil is a natural antibiotic that also helps kill viruses like Human immunodeficiency virus and Herpes viruses.
Doctor Beverly Teter: The coconut oil tends to keep the bacteria down so that if you’re assaulted with a virus, you’re immune system can concentrate on the virus. It doesn’t have to concentrate on 27 other bacteria that you may have been exposed to that day.
Lori Johnson: So consider coconut oil to improve your over all health and perhaps even go so far as to stave off life threatening diseases. Lori Johnson, CBS News
Raya’s Paradise had its annual unannounced state inspection 08/26/2011. There Licensing Program Analyst (LPA) passed us with 100%. Raya’s Paradise, Inc. always strives to maintain the highest standards in all fields of service to make sure that our residents get the highest possible care.
/by Raya's Paradise
Rayas Paradise 20th Anniversary from Michael Gamburd on Vimeo.
A brief view of Raya’s Paradise history.
/by Raya's ParadiseCorporate Office / General Information
Raya’s Paradise, Inc.
1156 N Gardner St.
West Hollywood, CA 90046
(Directions)
Tel: (310) 289-8834
Fax: (323) 851-0375
E-mail: Info@RayasParadise.com
Featured by Assisted Living Magazine as one of the best communities in Orange County